ENDOMETRIOSIS: a pictorial PLUS a geniusly written passage

For some reason today I'm feeling like sharing a retrospective pictorial regarding my ENDOMETRIOSIS...it very well could mean nothing, but I'm hoping that my seeing it as a past part of my life means it will soon truly be a PAST part of my life rather than it is at the present.

This is one of my first Katie, the bloat, pictures EVER from a few years ago.

I took this picture the day of my hysterectomy, the evening of the day I had it done and I'm holding a stuffed doggie that came with one of the flower arrangements I received.

I love this next pic, it is the day after my surgery. I just love the sense of relief, deep relief, that is all over my face. I still feel an overwhelming sense of freedom when looking at this picture.

During a healing session with my astonishingly amazing teacher, while being so incredibly bloated, we both came up with the most perfect name for the journey on which I currently find myself. I also love the layout and composition of this picture. It marks the beginning, to me, of this deep process of BRAVE HEALING.

The next two photos are of my incredibly largely, and painfully, swollen belly. There are not words yet to describe how much pain this bloating caused. Not only physically either, emotionally and mentally it was painful and exhausting because people question, judge and assume that I'm pregnant. That is incredibly difficult to deal with when I've already had a hysterectomy making that no longer feasible.

These next three photos are from my last endo-related hospital visit, also the only hospital visit during which I've been admitted. It was exhausting, painful, frustrating, scary, worrisome, vulnerable feeling. I was blessed to be in a beautiful hospital with a great private room with a very nice view and a tv with quite an assortment of movies available to watch.

I had been toying around with the thought of piercing my nose for a few years now. I began thinking more seriously about it and wanted to research and find out whether there was any significant meanings to which nostril was pierced...come to find out that the left nostril is associated with the female reproductive system and health....ummmm, really?! Literally once I learned that I made an appt at a piercing shop. It was one of the best decisions I've made in my life. It has helped me so much, it was another magical ingredient to this perfect concoction that has melded together to land me

 in this place of betterness.

All of a sudden after a meeting with another teacher of mine, my Katie had shrunk down in size at a great rate and by a large amount. The difference was a relief - physically and emotionally, not to mention very exciting!! The last two pictures are from that time.

Well, that's it tonight for pictures, but now I'd like to share with you a very important piece of writing that intelligently explains what this disease is, the author bravely shares her story and then she states why we MUST research until there is a cure. The author is a very brave, wise and beautiful endometriosis survivor, advocate and eloquent spokeswoman.

(This chunk of writing isn't short, but I find it important for me to share and hope you take a few minutes to read it. I guarantee most of you will learn something and maybe it will open your eyes just a little more)

The author is Nancy Peterson.

When I was diagnosed in `1969, I had pain and one hospitalization after another for 17 years, without a diagnosis. I did however experience multiple scoldingsabout pelvic exams not hurting as I tried to exit the exam table with the ratcheted speculum still in place and some psychological dismissal because its just her period.

Today, 44 years later, instead of prompt diagnosis and prompt treatment, we see diagnostic delays averaging 9 years. Nine years of pain, psychological dismissal, and disregard of severe pelvic pain. We have not come very far at all.

Making things worse, some are advocating that we not treat “minimal” disease at all. After all, it’s minimal, right? Well any endometriosis lesion can cause significant inflammation of the lining of the pelvis (aka peritoneum). Try living with a couple grains of sand in your eye for a lifetime? It is the same kind of inflammatory response. This kind of misogynist approach to endometriosis care is outrageous. It is steeped in “there is not enough money to treat all 180,000,000 women worldwide” for their endometriosis. Let me tell you, if 180, million men worldwide had unbearable pain during sex, bowel movements and exercise, and were offer as treatment, femininzing hormones, surgical castration or pregnancy? It would be an international emergency to which we would transfer our combined defense budgets. We would not be having this misogynist conversation regarding enough money. 

The peritoneum is the thin saran wrap-like lining of the pelvic cavity and the organs. Its role is primarily protective. If there is blunt abdominal trauma, infection, appendicitis, leaking organs it reacts swiftly and predictably. There is bloating, intense abdominal pain, nausea, paleness, restlessness, anxiety, (oh, you recognize that, do you) and every medical and nursing student on the planet has been taught to recognize these symptoms and respond quickly. A differential diagnosis must be made promptly and the peritonea quality pain treated with pain medication. In women with endometriosis we can somehow dismiss the intensity of her pain with the assessment, “oh, it’s just her period”. This is outrageous that we would ignore either in an ER or in a private practice, peritoneal quality pain without treating it. 

If the caregivers do not have the skill or interest in excising endometriosis, at least treat the pain. It is as intense as appendicitis. I know I have had both. Or better yet refer the patient to someone who can remove disease effectively. On our endometriosis boards on Facebook and other organizations, (where thousands of desperate women with endometriosis gather) we have identified less than 100 gynecological surgeons out of 52,000 in the USA who treat disease effectively, and yet most believe they can. Treating effectively is permanent relief of pain in one or two surgeries. This disconnect is a huge problem. Drugs do not treat endometriosis, they alter the normal hormonal state the woman tries to live in. Once, when giving a lecture on modern concepts in endometriosis, I had two surgeons confront me during the intermission. They said surgery was not necessary, they were curing their patients with triple dose danazol and then they stormed from the room.

When the lecture resumed the crowd interrupted and wanted know what the surgeons said. I told them they were “curing” endometriosis with danazol. I wondered aloud why they would think that. The nearly 100 women in the room shouted almost in unison, “Because we don’t go back”. So if caregivers are thinking they are helping their patients with medical therapy, perhaps they are not listening close enough, or their patients are not coming back.

In the 1980’s when I was managing the Endometriosis Treatment Program at St Charles Medical Center in Bend Oregon, we saw patients from around the world. They were all multiple treatment failures both surgical and medical. Seventy-five percent of them had been dismissed as neurotic. All had active, painful endometriosis as determined by independent board certified pathologists. Today, still I hear from woman after woman who has been told she has no disease and to seek psychological help. Yet when we manage to get her into the hands of a doctor doing advanced excision, she has active endometriosis and experiences dramatic long lasting relief. 

Women with endometriosis live lives of quiet desperation. They have learned to be quiet because most do not believe the quality and severity of their pain. Their support systems often abandon them because doctors could find nothing wrong. Yet they present with peritoneal signs and symptoms. Will we continue to turn a blind eye? Or can we have the necessary compassion for their plight? If we cannot surgically resolve their disease, could we consider referring them to someone who can? Or can we put them into a pain management program? They will not become addicted, they may become dependent, but at least they will be able to get up off the couch and put the heating pad away and resume living a life. Endometriosis is not a terminal disease, but despair can be and has been among women with endometriosis. I know of many, one is simply too many. 

What I believe we need are trained surgeons to surgically deal with lower stage disease everywhere, and referral centers for complex, deeply infiltrating disease. Hysterectomies do not cure endo, there are thousands of us that were fooled into believing that. It is unacceptable to continue to expect these women to cope with peritoneal quality disease without help and without relief. We are either part of the problem, or part of the solution. We cannot continue to ignore their plight. There is a significant body of data now showing that excision of endometriosis lesions restores lives. How long will we continue to ignore that?

One of my heroes is Sister Kenny, an Australian Nurse who developed physical therapy for the acute effects of polio. Her therapy and hot woolen packs prevented joint fusion and relieved pain. She was soundly trounced worldwide by orthopedic experts caring for polio patients for years. Gradually, there was recognition that she was right. When asked why she thought it took so long for others to see that suffering could be ended with simple changes in care, she responded: “When we speak with the voice of authority, we come to believe we are the authority”. When I read that, I thought, yes, despite evidence to the contrary. Well, there is evidence, plenty of it that skilled excision restores lives.

Lastly, another hero of mine is Margaret Mead a cultural anthropologist from the last century. She said: “Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed people can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has.” Be that small group, (180 million worldwide) that changes the world for women with endometriosis. Work with gynecologists everywhere to raise awareness of just how much this disease impacts lives and how inadequate many approaches are. Give them back their lives, their sexuality, their education track, their fertility, their love of life, get them up off the couch, and turn off the heating pads with truly effective surgical management of endometriosis. It is time to stop ignoring the destructive impact this disease has on women’s lives, the lives of their families, spouses, significant others. Actually, it’s way past time.

******

Well tonight's blog ended up being an interesting combination and quite long at that, so thank you readers for putting in the time tonight to read. Blogging is such an awesome platform for information to be transmitted not only freely but easily. I have found great joy and a sense of both release and purpose in the blogging I've been doing.

I BLOG FOR ENDO AWARENESS!!

~namasté and good night all...and get all those so. cal peeps, aren't y'all grateful for the rain tonight!!

What a difference 16 days makes

Now to backtrack a little and give a little more detail about my endo history, I've suffered from endometriosis for a little over fifteen years. It took several incredibly long, painful, expensive and emotional years to get to a diagnosis! Even though the diagnosis was absolutely terrifying, it was such a relief to FINALLY have an answer, an explanation of my suffering. 

Over the past few weeks I've gone through a lot physically, that I've previously blogged about. The following image with the words fits:

Sometimes I feel like the

real me is slowly being

dissolved by this pain.

That so perfectly describes how I've felt for so many (too many really) years. Pain and hopelessness such as this can only be truly understood by those who've experienced it.

However, over the past 16 days a magical, truly cosmic, combination of medication, physical and dietary changes, emotional and spiritual work and growth, has resulted in a rather INCREDIBLE transition, a really 

overwhelmingly beautiful healing.

This first picture was me at the end the very end of last week, feeling quite a bit better, very tentatively, scared that at any second the so-called other shoe would drop and I'd be thrust back into the pain that was so commonly my experience. I do like to keep a photo journal tracking how I'm feeling, especially when experiencing drastic changes, so I can share it with my doctor when needed.

                              

And, again the following picture is of me this morning at work, feeling physically amazing. This reprieve of my physical ailments is truly a pleasantly unexpected turn of events and I plan on being deeply grateful for every second that continues in this direction.

I have joined several online endometriosis support groups via Facebook. I've made a lot of gloriously brave and beautiful friends, 

sisters there. This meme that says

'don't let endometriosis dull your sparkle'

has been such an inspiration for me during this entire process. I hope I haven't been to tarnished or as weathered as I feel throughout

 this hellish journey.

It is mind-blowing what differences can be made in a short 16 days. Below I've made a comparison photo: the smaller photo is of me is one night while I was in the hospital, the middle of the night, in excruciating pain and hours away from my next pain med dosage and the bigger image is me today, which is 16 days later!! I simply cannot get over the difference.

I wanted to share this transformation specifically with other endo sisters out there. Just 16 days ago I was feeling really hopeless of getting ok, much less really good, ever. I want all of my beautiful fellow endometriosisters to catch a glimmer of hope from my experience. I'm not being blinded by the fact that there are still some physical things I need to take care of and more processes to go through, but I will not project into the future my fear and anxieties; 

I'm simply going to enjoy and maybe unpack a bit in this new place of feeling so good.

Thank you for reading my blog this afternoon.

I love all my endo sisters out there.

~namasté.

quick update & thanks

Over the past few weeks a lot of things have changed within my body:

~ I'm no longer constantly nauseated

~  I'm not experiencing nearly as much bleeding

~  I'm sleeping better

~  My endo pains are much better, less common; though my liver and back can be excruciating

~ Still experiencing hot flashes and night sweats

Overall I'd say I'm doing better in terms of my endometriosis, I am however absolutely physically exhausted from my hospitalization a few weeks ago. I am nervous about my liver, but have confidence in my doctors, more importantly I have (it might be more accurate to say I'm learning how to have confidence my the healing ability of my body) confidence in my body and it's ability to heal.

It is during the past few weeks, since coming home from the hospital, that I feel a completely renewed and even stronger love and deep reverence for my sweet kitty. 

I've had Tink since he was a tiny baby kitten. We are very close and connected on a super deep soul-level. He knows when I don't feel good, even before I know. He cuddles and is enormous so serves as a great hot water bottle. His purr is like magic, seriously healing. He and his incredibly strong, nearly palpable love is stronger than any of the medications I've ever taken.

He is half Bengal and half Abyssinian. He is 28 glorious pounds of pussycat. This summer will mark the 10 year anniversary of bringing him home. I love this picture of his gloriously wild markings in his strong profile. His inner beauty, believe it or not, by far surpasses his outer beauty which is pretty overwhelming also.

I love how precious he looks when he sleeps. He loves the blanket in the before picture, it practically matches his fur. 

Experiencing this reprieve of my endometriosis has offered me a clearer lens thru which to view this painful disease/experience. This thought dropped down into me in almost a palpable way:

Just because I'm strong enough to handle the pain that didn't mean I deserve it.

WOW talk about a radical concept to wrap around myself. I wish to share this "simple" idea with as many suffering, BRAVE, beautiful, amazing endometriosisters as I can, or anyone suffering from a chronic illness.

This is just another step forward, maybe a big step even, on my path of LOVING myself to HEALTH: 

BRAVE HEALING

Just wanted to share my latest thoughts and experiences. Below is Tink taking great care of me this past weekend while I was experiencing some extremely deep physical liver-related pain.

Thank you all so very much for taking the time to read my blog. I hope you enjoyed it, connected with any part of it or learned something. Please feel free to start any dialogue here, I'm completely open to having a discussion, answer questions about my experience and really would like to see the tabbooness of endometriosis dissipate - that is one of my goals by writing this blog.

A big love and fur-filled hug from Tink to all of you and me.

~namasté

so...now what?!

This past week has been quite a tumultuous one...and an emotional one at that.

It has taken me several days to get my emotions under control enough that writing a post was even physiologically possible.

So, let's start at the beginning:

Last Saturday, a week from tomorrow, I had to get up early to work a health fair and to represent the organization for which I work. I woke up with a little more than moderate endo cramps. Noticed no difference in them, popped two of my pain meds and continued with getting ready to start my workday. Got to the office right on time, immediately began working on collecting all I needed to take with me. . .all the while feeling physically not that bad, my new norm.

Then came time to pack up my car. I locked up the office, and put my rolling cart into my car, no problems. Then the first inkling of not feeling well struck me. It began with just a feeling of being flushed. Felt like if I simply sat with the a/c running I'd feel better. Got in, turned the car and a/c on, blasted that cold air on my face. After only a few moments I knew something was about to happen. I got out of the car, took a few steps and fell to the ground with a deep, excruciating pain radiating from deep in the middle of my chest and back toward my right upper abdomen and continuing to my mid to upper back. I had sweat dripping all over my body, down my face, all over my chest and back. I was overcome by nausea, thought I was going to, and even tried to, puke a few times. I had no idea what to do. I was absolutely terrified as I could feel my heart beating throughout my whole body- felt it really strongly. I felt like I was having a heart attack. Luckily I had my cell phone in my pocket because at this point I was unable to move much, much less get up. 

Grabbed my phone and called a friend of mine who I knew lived close to where I was and who I trusted to help me. I was writhing around on the asphalt of the parking lot of my work. Within minutes she was there with me rubbing my back as we developed our plan of attack. I KNEW this was something serious that required emergency attention, but not necessarily a 911 situation. We decided she would drop me off at my house then drop off the materials to the booth I was supposed to be working and then come back, reassess and go from there.

The next two pictures are photos I took while I waited for her return. It was really the most painful experience I've had, not to mention scary. My cat totally knew it too- he immediately laid over my chest and began licking my face. He stayed with me until my friend returned. 

Here is my protective little nurse kitty, Tink.

 I love him so.

When she returned nothing had improved, though the chest pain had subsided, I was still writhing in physical pain, tears falling, in absolute misery. We decided to go to our local ER, though my medical group and doctors are about 30 miles from me. I couldn't imagine doing the drive in that state. I packed my softest blanket, changed into comfier clothes, grabbed a water, and we were on our way.

Below is right after they gave me my first morphine injection- which helped but didn't completely take away the pain- complete agony is the only way to describe how I felt.

And then began the tests: blood work, urinalysis and an ultrasound. The imaging showed some thickening of my gallbladder, liver. . .which they thought was caused by gallstones. I was then informed that I would need to be transferred to Cedars Sinai, the hospital where my doctors work. Not only that...but I had to be transferred via ambulance -yikes!! But the doctor insisted that ambulance transport was "medically necessary"... and again, we were off.

This first pic is me, not so patiently waiting for my 'rig'. Still in excruciating pain and nausea at this point and fearing surgery to deal with the gallstones I was led to believe I had.

Here I am all hooked up in the ambulance.

 And let me just say:

Nausea + Ambulance ride (backwards) = torture

And the view out the window on our way down. My ambulance drivers were awesome, that was a big plus. We listened to music pretty loud and really had some great conversation.

When I arrived to the hospital, my room was all prepared which meant no ER, no admitting, no waiting, AND my room had this awesome view!

Not only the nice view, but a nice flat screen tv with a variety of channels, and a bunch of free movies to watch and nice artwork. I was very happy with this private room.

This is one of my several ivs I had during this stay. I was impressed, each nurse got it right with only one try, normally I'm a very hard stick- that was a relief.

This following pic is during my first night, woke up in excruciating pain, and of course hours before my next pain med dose. I cannot yet find the words to describe how much my body was hurting, but I think this picture does a pretty good job of speaking for me.

While at Cedars I had: an ultrasound and doppler done of my kidneys, bladder, liver, gallbladder and pancreas; x-rays of my cervical, thoracic and lumbar regions of my spine; and an MRI with contrast, countless blood tests for God knows what.

I had a team of four doctors and one care manager. I informed each of them of my endometriosis and that I had begun taking Lupron therapy a little over a month ago. They all shrugged me off saying neither my endo nor my Lupron could have anything to do with this issue. They were split down the middle as to whether they thought the liver or gallbladder was the culprit. For some reason I was compelled to tell my doctors repeatedly about my endo and Lupron therapy-- I KNEW IT!!! (My endosisters know how this goes: I think the second you say you have endo is likely the same second that doctors write you off). They repeatedly shrugged it and me off. 

I had stayed in the hospital long enough that they gave me a new gown to change into and unplugged me so I could shower and wash my hair. It is amazing how good it feels to shower and to be clean after so long of just laying there. And they give you an option of having a back rub when you want to go to sleep to help relax you-- lemme tell you I hit them up on that every night! It was very nice.

I had several visitors, most at one time!! That was very enjoyable: Karines, Jamie, Angie, my mom and Cis, and the night before Stacey came to visit. Stacey brought me a hospital survival kit that was so awesome: a cute tote bag filled with a sketch book, markers, colored pencils, a notebook to write in, erasers, glue sticks, pretty papers, scissors, crossword book, a funny book, root beer!! Very useful to avoid boredom.

These flowers are from Jamie and Angie, they definitely lifted my spirits with my favorite colors and some of my favorite flowers.

 They are perfection.

And Karines brought me some treats! My favorite, the most delicious cronuts: blueberry, maple& bacon and cinnamon sugar. 

Life-changingly delicious I tell you!!

I was even lucky enough to have my recently washed hair French braided!! I love having it braided, definitely made it easier to deal with while in the hospital.

So... what was wrong, you ask after all that?!

My liver is inflamed and my liver count is 4 times normal and then some -- what is that coming from or causing that, you ask??

No less than the therapy that I've used recently for my endo...gee the same thing I had suggested several times only to be shut down, frequently in addition being told that that was a ridiculous thought. Huh! Well, I've only been in my body for almost 31 years now, so what do I know?!

Unfortunately I had a 3 month injection of Lupron done January 3, so there is still like six weeks or seven of that being strongly present within my system. I cannot therefore do the following injection as we had planned. 

This is where my emotions come into play. I'm absolutely devastated that this has happened, for so many reasons:

~I watched my dad die in the hospital, wearing the same patterned hospital gowns that I had to wear, very uncomfortable feeling!

~ The treatment that has finally been successful has really fucked up my liver 

(sorry but that is the only word that works)

~ It makes me angry "just" having to go through all of this. Isn't having endo for 15 years and to have a hysterectomy at a somewhat young age enough of a toll to pay?!

~ What will happen to my body while that drug remains in my system?

~ I'm terrified of what my next ob/gyn appointment will entail...what news will I get?

~ I'm scared of the recovery from this. I'm absolutely exhausted. ALL THE TIME, nauseous, in pain, hot flashing, having chills, crying, sigh. The doctors said it could take several weeks to several months to get back to my norm.

~I am scared of what just happened to my body happening again. I had just started feeling my body, feeling safe in my body and I feel quite a bit further away from that feeling now

Wow, writing this blog has taken me so much longer than it normally does. 

I am absolutely exhausted, so I'm going to hit the sack with my kitty.

Thank you all for your love and support during this most difficult time. I LOVE you all.

And to my endometriosisters, I hope this finds you painfree, enjoying your lives, as we should be able!!

~namasté.

BRAVE healing--big day, or should I say a way smaller day!

Well over the past few months, though it feels like months and months and months, I've been trying and trying, so hard to conquer ENDOMETRIOSIS, again. It is a disease that really wreaks havoc in the lives of those afflicted in every aspect of their lives:

 physically, spiritually, emotionally, 

mentally, professionally, socially

 - truly in every aspect. 

I have found through this bout with endo, more than my experiences before, that it does in fact give us a gift, an opportunity: 

to work VERY hard with a lot of work to interact with the endo on an emotional and spiritual level, which I would suspect is different for each girl but, that is an opportunity for a major 

heart and soul blossoming that might 

not be possible otherwise.

I have done a lot of hard inner work over these past few physically hellish weeks and have begun to reap the benefits, the work will continue and thus will the benefits--

 I do not know this for sure,

 but I'm CHOOSING to believe it, 

to believe IN it, IN me.

This most recent bout of endometriosis truly, literally popped out of nowhere. I was looking my normal weight one Friday at work, then went home and found myself like this:

These pictures continue to shock me. It was so incredibly physically uncomfortable to be so bloated, it was uncomfortable in more ways than that. It was also difficult to deal with having a physical condition that has resulted in my having to have a hysterectomy

 (hello infertility at 28!) and then being so bloated in my belly that I truly looked nothing but massively pregnant. I was never someone who wanted to have kids, EVER, but making that permanent decision and having that done this early in my life was still a big decision to make-- yet the only one I saw if my life were to continue. On a nearly daily basis, while in physical agony, having to deal with massive emotions resulting in being asked if I was pregnant, offered congratulations, or even having my belly touched by strangers in excitement of my apparently obvious pregnancy. Being so emotionally upset, I believe, also helped the belly, named Katie, grow more, thus a vicious cycle was born. Following are just a few pictures of this serious bloating, I think the assumption of my being pregnant is completely understandable (which doesn't really make it any easier to deal with) in these pictures.

Pretty incredible, RIGHT?!

These last two were just four weeks ago!!

Today I went for a hike to what I'm now calling the Endo Cave with a great girlfriend. It truly felt like a rebirthing experience, and a rebirthing without Katie! It is such an overwhelming feeling to see my body now how it looks. It hits me very strongly and deeply, 

and it is incredibly emotional.

Here is one of the pictures from today of Karines and me that I really like!

On our way to the Endo Cave I found the perfectly calm place to take a quick moment for myself, connecting deeply 

with myself AND with my body.

Also found the perfect place to show my beautiful rescued pup, Dakota, her first waterfall. She really LOVED the hike. I fell in love with this pic of us together in this most beautiful, calming, sacred place 

peacefully LOVING each other.

Then it was off to the Endo Cave!! I couldn't wait to go in - and this time to not have Katie, to not have to worry about fitting or getting stuck trying to go in or get out of the cave

This was my friend's first time in the cave. Since she's been with me during some of the hardest parts and times of my disease and offered nothing but support, she was the perfect friend to come to the cave without Katie! She understands my excitement about 

that more than most!

In the midst of our exploring and messing around in the cave, taking tons of pictures, I HAD to find sometime for a serene moment for some meditation IN myself, IN endo. I felt something I cannot yet put to words physically happen and yet it did feel magical, I did, unfortunately return home with a pelvic crampage that I can't quite get to go away.

Coming out of the cave is not easy, even without the Katie bloat present... at least this time I didn't have to worry about getting stuck!

It does feel like a rebirthing of sorts and the fact that you come out into a waterfall makes it the perfect baptism: 

starting over, strengthening of 

my BRAVE healing for sure!

We both felt great coming out of the cave! I feel like we both have a glow in this pic that we took right after we got out of the cave. 

I love this picture!

I love my relationship with Karines and am truly grateful to have her in my life. She is always there when you need a ride to the ER, or when you are going to a party when you know not one person, or when you need a roadtrip up the coast, or when you have to go to your dad's funeral, or when you need to move, or when you need endless help having a severely broken leg, the examples are countless... We have had so many super fun and absolutely ridiculous crazy times and I'm so glad I'm on this path of BRAVE healing so that we can continue having our awesome adventures together.

Love ya, Karines.

Today was absolutely the perfect hike and cave experience considering where I am in my BRAVE healing process. I'm grateful to everyone who has helped me along the way in such a wide variety of ways. 

To all of my beautiful endometriosisters out there, I send you such big loves and healing hugs for the BRAVE journey you are also experiencing. I think if we share our experiences it is not only powerful for us, the ones experiencing it, but also for our friends, and even people we don't know. 

To all of my readers that are not impacted directly by ENDOMETRIOSIS, it is from the bottom of my heart that I thank you for continuing to read my blog. This blog serves as SUCH an outlet for me and hopefully some type of education for you and helps you to understand, even if only a little bit, more about what women with ENDOMETRIOSIS go through with this disease. 

Namasté, all.

Thank you for reading. 

P.S. if you have a story, question, etc. feel free to share it here. I'd love to have this as a safe platform for both people who don't know about endo and those who have or have had it to share in an absolutely completely safe place.

I am in LOVE with the before picture and find it the perfect pic to use to end my blog tonight.

Love, love.